Whatif's keep us in the past
So think about today,
cus' you can't make tomorow
from yesturday

...

so here's today's question:

What kind of hair style should I get?

annnnnnnnd ... I've done it again :p ... ok, folks, since I'm to lazy to erase all of that crap bellow, I'm just going to ask you, once again, to ignore and not read it. Not only will it make you happy, but it'll make me happy too. I've worked things through in my mind, and I've decided that the best thing to do is to grab my head, give it a shake, and get back to the business of being me. You know, that layed back guy that dousn't let things faze him? Yeah, I've missed that guy, so I'm gonna dust him off and put him back on. It's time I got back to learning how to 'love the world', as I like to call it. Maybe even get back to listening. Don't think I've done that in a while....

so ignore it all! lets just smile, nod, and tip our hats goodby, cus' I don't want to dwell on yesturday. I'm going to make my future from today

well, maybe tomorow morning...

Well, I guess I've pretty much killed any chances of being even a slightly fond memory for Ava. I just read her journal, and it seems I've gone and done it again! I had considered not posting the things I had been thinking at 6am the morning she broke up with me, cus' I knew this would happen... which is, of corse, why I titled it "don't take it serriously" and why I included a statment to the effect of 'ignore me, I just feel like shooting my mouth off' .... which I don't see as a complete bad thing. I don't know why I'm writing this now, she'll probably never read it. Prolly should never have made that post, but I guess I was lashing out or something ... don't know why I'm posting this now. I mean, this is what I want, isn't it? Push her even farther away? I dunno ...


Know what, then? It's decided ... I'm a stupid, imature kid who can't seem to find his way out of the box he's put himself in. So I'm gonna go to bed, and in the morning I'm going to shave, I'm going to clean EVERYTHING, I'm gonna go swimming, I'm gonna go transfer my art video, and I'm gonna be AWAKE.

Ok, you guys can comment now if you wanna. I'm borred off my ass. Exams are done and I have nothing big to worry
about anymore.



I wanna go dancing on the moon
but stay away from me with that silver spoon
I want to see the world from the balls of my feet
And never a gilden plate from which to eat

Rolling 1

I saw her today at the reception
a glass of wine in her hand
I new she was going to meet her connection
At her feat was, a footloose man

You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
But if you try sometimes, you might find
You get what you need!

And I went down to the demonstration
To get my fair share of abuse
Singing we're gonna vent our frustration
If we don't we're gonna blow a fifty amp fuse

You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
But if you try sometimes, you might find
You get what you need!

AWWWW Baby, yeah!

I went down to the Chelsea drugstore
To get your prescription filled
I was standin' in line with Mr. Jimmy
A-man, did he look pretty ill

You can't always get what you want well no!
You can't always get what you want tell ya baby
You can't always get what you want no
But if you try sometimes, you just might find, mmm!
Mmm! you get what you need
Ooh yes! Woo!

You get what you need
Yeah!
Ooow, babe!
Ooh, yeah

I saw her today at the reception
In her glass was a bleeding man
She was practiced at the art of deception
Well, I could tell by her blood-stained hands
Say it!

You can't always get what you want yeah!
You can't always get a-what you want ooo-yeah, baby!
You can't always get a-what you want
But if you try sometime, you just might find
You just might find
You get what you need

Ooh, yeah!
Ooh, baby!
Woo!

Ah, you can't always get a-what you want
No, no baby

You can't always get a-what you want
Tellin' you right now

You can't always get what you want, mmm!
But if you try sometimes you just might find
You just might find, that ya
Get what you need
Oooh, yeah!

I'm tellin' the truth, babe

-The Rolling Stones

The worst part is that she was the first person I truely felt comfortable enough to get out of my skin for. The only persn. Now I have to find that again. But then again, maybe thats the problem too, maybe I should be seperating myself from people instead, keep just a little back, bottle things in just a little more.

I feel like a winter hat in the middle of the summer. Nobody wants to wear me, and I'm really out of place. Sure, they look all fine and dandy when it's snowing, but as soon as the summer hits you loose intrest and just put them away...